Part Four
[The speaker continues to talk about the time when she went to the Northern part of the city of Mitrovica]
Valdete Idrizi:…this happened a little earlier, I mean in 2001, right after we founded CBM. And we tried, they told me, “No, because of safety issues, we cannot send you there and you can’t go to your apartment.” And, however I said, “I want to take the risk, no matter what happens,” and I didn’t think about it because had I thought longer, I would have probably not gone.
And we left together with my sister, we took a black bag, a pretty big one because we thought of taking as many things as we could, because we didn’t manage to take anything when they chased us out. And we went in front of our building. It didn’t even take us five minutes from the bridge because we walked so quickly to go to our apartment. And it is not that far either way. When we arrived there, we wanted to enter… because somebody had told us that there were groups, that they had gone, they told us that it was empty. That motivated us to go and try if there was anything left.
And when we went in front of the building, the door was always open. I mean, five, a big building, five stories, we lived on the third. It was locked, I never experienced it before, it had never been locked before. And I went to the supermarket downstairs. There was a neighbor, her name was Zorica. I entered and in Serbian I said, “Do you have the key?” I said, “Because I want to go to my apartment.” She opened her eyes wide open and said, “Even if I had it,” she said, “I wouldn’t dare give it to you.” She said, “You better leave.” I {mimics surprise}, you know? I wondered what was wrong with her. And, alright.
In the meantime, my sister went behind the building to call a neighbor who had worked for the DRC earlier. I had resigned from the DRC but however, just in case, I took the…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Badge?
Valdete Idrizi:…the badge, because they were a good tool. “With the foreigners” you were somehow safe, or immune, I don’t know how to call it. I took it with me. It had expired because I wasn’t working for the DRC anymore but I said, “Let’s just take it with me just in case.” And knowing that my neighbor works there, I called him, my sister went behind the building to call him, and in the meantime I stayed in the front in order to be there in case someone would come out. And in the meantime, somebody had seen me, and I didn’t see them, and I was, I mean, in front of the parked cars.
I don’t know, you know, but somehow I have always been lucky, I don’t know how I moved, but I just saw a big pot in front of my legs. Somebody had dropped it from the fifth floor and they were shouting, swearing in Serbian. When I looked up, I saw that they were talking to me. I just moved. I know that my shoes were all ruined because of the soil from the big pot. Imagine, if it fell on me, I would remain there. But somehow I was shocked, “What happened?” And then I shouted out of control, “What is wrong with you?” Then, until my sister came, I mean she didn’t hear anything because she was behind the building calling our neighbor to open the door…
Six women came down very quickly, they were all dressed in black, and they attacked me. I didn’t feel pain because of fear, you know… such a moment… but I know that when I returned, I was all covered in blood. For some time, it took me quite some time to recover, I mean from those scars that…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: What was the reason, why did they attack you?
Valdete Idrizi: They…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: What was the reason?
Valdete Idrizi: …first they would say, “Marš u Albaniju!” which means, “Go to Albania!” “What do you want here? Are you here to threaten us?” Because they knew that my mother had tried to go there many times. When they went to, when they threatened her, she had told them, “I will throw a bomb on you.” What kind of a bomb…. And they took it as a threat. And once you go, they also knew that my brother was in the war, you know!
And they were dressed in black. They must have had their relatives missing or killed, or someone during the war…. And when…one of them was my former neighbor, and I know that they got me leaning on a car and they hit me as much as they could. There I saw two French soldiers, two young soldiers pass by and I shouted, “Help” [English], they just stared at me and turned around and left. Maybe that was more of a disappointment, for example, that there were people with weapons, because it was peace, you know? But somehow it seemed as if they were afraid for themselves.
I thought within myself, “It would make sense if I were a man, an armed man who would be a danger to them, but for God’s sake, I am only a woman!” And you know, how could they not intervene, and this was something… somehow… I don’t know, I experienced a great disappointment. Because, you know? Only later did I start feeling the pain, because I didn’t feel any pain at that moment, at all, at all, at all. I only know that the badge saved my life. Because when my neighbor came, whom in the meantime my sister had called, when the neighbor came, the badge saved my life, I said, “I will fire Vuca,” his son.
With this, you know. Who was I? I had resigned from that job. But I didn’t know what to say in order to survive. And then she made the women go away. In the meantime, my sister came, she went crazy when she saw me, because she didn’t know. But in my case, now, between two buildings there were two other Albanian neighbors who remained there until later. Then later, they put pressure on them and made them leave too. They had two, my friend had two missing brothers who had been killed during the war. I mean, she had remained there with her mother and brother. And they heard me scream when I was attacked, and they called KFOR and the gendarmerie in order to come and take us out of our apartment.
Then we went upstairs to our apartment. We managed to take something, but I don’t know what I took… nor what was there, nor what I had, because I mean, we were afraid. My sister leaned on the door, until somebody would come to save us, and maybe wait for the situation to calm down and leave. I was trying to take something, and I don’t know…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Was anything left? Was it still…
Valdete Idrizi: Everything was… there were some books, some photo albums. I took something, but I couldn’t select things. We didn’t have more than five-six minutes. Plus, the neighbor came. “Don’t be afraid, because they cannot do anything to you. They will come now.” Then KFOR came and took us out and we returned. But, I know that when a journalist wanted to interview me, I didn’t agree t at all. I couldn’t imagine how a woman can be violent. Because, as I told you earlier, I have always believed in women, and I never thought that women and arms go together.
It was a kind of… on one hand I had the disappointment from the peacekeeping forces. I got reminded of Srebrenica and many, many other things. How brain functions in this kind of situations. And I know that I kept a scarf around my throat for one week so that others wouldn’t notice. And I don’t even know why I decided to keep that story shut, not to talk about it.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Did you feel like it was your responsibility not to disappoint the others as well, or what?
Valdete Idrizi: Maybe, maybe, because I actually didn’t want to admit it, I didn’t even know how to admit it. And I know that I told those at home that, “Don’t worry, I survived. That is important.” And I know that I said, “Thank God,” I said, “This time,” because really when I thought how it could fall on me and kill me right there. That was a situation for a time, I really didn’t… people in the organization knew what happened, but I had chosen not to talk about it. And they knew and they respected my decision. And I didn’t want to stay at home and lock myself, but to come and pretend that it wasn’t nothing, even though it was very difficult to pretend, but at least this made it possible for me to continue, to simply continue working.
And somehow I am thankful for that energy, I don’t know what pushed me towards such a decision, because maybe I would close it right there, my work, and the organization and I don’t know what else I would do, or wouldn’t do. But, I am thankful for the energy or to the motivation to take such a decision.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Were there mixed families here before the war?
Valdete Idrizi: A few.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: A few?
Valdete Idrizi: I know that there were only a few. We could count them on our fingers. There weren’t many. For example, there were Bosniaks and Serbians, that were, you know, married. Then some remained on this side, the others on the other. But there weren’t many of them. We knew all those families well. There weren’t many mixed families. No marriages but… how to say, socialization was divided before, even in coffee shops, it all began earlier. I mean, not only at that time but also a decade earlier, or more, it was divided.
And then having that experience from three years before, 2004, I thought that I had to do something, to work with colleagues and return to plan B and C. I knew that a minivan drove from the bridge several times a day, it drove people who had things to do in the court. Be it Albanians, Roma, Bosniaks, it would drive all the communities that lived in the South to there and vice-versa. And, people used it. And I went to them, there were police from Pakistan or India, I don’t remember. And I asked them, I wrote a letter, I said, “I am this, this and this.” “No, no, no, no.” [English] They would only allow you if you had a document from the court.
The daughter of my paternal uncle worked in the court. As every Albanian, doing something illegally, especially when you have no other way… I said, “Can you make a request as if I have something to do in court, that I want a meeting with the staff there?” “Alright.” I did that letter, and I faked that letter for eight months in a row, changing its date. And I would only change it, I became an expert in faking letters, and I would put it in a plastic bag because I was afraid it would be ruined. You know, because I thought, “I will need this even later.” But, each time I crossed, I was afraid they would catch me.
I would just do it like this {illustrates how she showed them the document}, and I would hide it, that, “I have a meeting today.” And it was a very difficult period, because somebody knew that I had nothing to do there. It was difficult because each time I went, I was afraid they would capture me. Sometimes they would realize that you were going more often. I felt happy when the driver changed, because he would think that he didn’t see me for one week or two. But when they saw you three times a week, it was difficult. And at the same time, the activity of faking documents was very difficult, you know, as a feeling. I mean, this speaks about the support we had from organizations, who could send me there without any problem if they wanted to.
Because they would go, I would always meet the same people there. Because the building where our office was located, there were the offices of some other organizations there as well, and they would see me. And they somehow knew how I had gone there. You know, they were the same ones who had refused me. Sometimes I had troubles returning because there was no room in the mini van, the last one was at 15:15, if I am not mistaken, when the court closed, I would remain there. I had to wait until late at night so that nobody would see me crossing, because you know, they could attack or beat me. And one of my colleagues would escort me to the neighborhood of the Bosniaks and the other bridge was calmer. And it was one of the most difficult periods.
Because on the other hand, we were doing good job, we were developing some ideas, then there was the energy that we could return once again, the trust that we could become an organization. And on the other hand, there was the constant fear that you were doing something that was illegal. The fear that something would happen to you again. And it was really, really difficult to return as a staff, as an organization once again. Then, after eight months we returned, or less, I don’t remember, because it was April, and in the end of October we came together as an organization again.
They started liberalizing a little, the fences got smaller, and this simply was made possible. But I know that if I wasn’t there, if I didn’t fake [the letter] or [didn’t make] the terrible journey, I know that it would be impossible and very difficult to make my colleagues come here. And then taking care of the partnership which we had created with people from the North from all communities, because there they lived in mixed neighborhoods. Even Albanians who had remained there all the time during the war and after the war, there were some who had returned gradually, I mean, individually, to their houses, and I mean, with other communities.
I mean we had already… this is the responsibility of the trust they had on us as an organization. I mean, the responsibility was the greatest motivation for us, I mean for me as the leader of an organization to give them hope even when I didn’t have much hope myself.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Serbs from the North, did they deal with the other national communities as well… ?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes.
Erëmirë Krasniqi:…Or only with Serbs?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, yes, no, we were together as a team…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: You mean the project…
Valdete Idrizi:…we went together as a team everywhere. Even when we went to enclaves or to the neighborhood Kodra e Minatorëve [Miners Hill] that are mixed, we went together, Albanians and Serbs. And we really spoke one language… we had one mission. It wasn’t… Sometimes for example, they assessed that only Serbs had to go, I trusted them, we sent only them until the situation calmed down. Or like this, at the same time we had developed our youth programs which somehow motivated us to work. The School of Rock had just started. Not officially yet, it wasn’t founded as a school, but the project itself existed. On the other hand we were looking for talents.
We watched the students sometimes, we went to each other’s [side] because we were afraid for their safety as well. But it was very encouraging, I mean, their collaboration. Then they also served to change the opinions of their parents for example, usually it is the contrary. To us in Mitrovica, it often happened that children or students were an example to their teachers or parents, yes.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Where was the Rock School, was it in the North or South?
Valdete Idrizi: In both sides. We couldn’t do it only in the South because they were children. It was, I mean, it was a mutual decision that we don’t dare send any child because they are only children. We didn’t want to put their lives in danger. But with the internet and the era of technology, they started to create groups together and a kind of website where they wrote about their experiences. Others read them. And then in the summer school which we organized, they made common bands, common songs and sang them together. So, that was a really great motivation for us.
For example, in the beginning, parents wouldn’t give us permission. They asked us, when we wanted to get their permission, because when we wanted to go abroad, for example in Macedonia, they would write and say… because we needed their consent, because otherwise they wouldn’t allow us to cross the border… No. For example, “What kind of music will you be listening to on your way to Skopje? With whom will my daughter or my son sit?” I mean, we had to work not only for weeks, but for months, in order to convince them to give us permission. For example, the following year, according to these good experiences, parents would ask themselves, “Can you provide common transport?”
Because according to the friendship that the students had created, and those parents who had asked the difficult questions and didn’t want to allow their children… especially Serbs, we had more questions from them than from Albanians, because, “Why are you going through Albanian [lands] in order to go there?” And then it was encouraging to see them. I mean, there was no more… simply, a group of talented children who cultivated good music. At the same time we started a project with the newsletter, a magazine in which we wrote about the South and the North. For example, “What works here and what doesn’t work there?” That initiated dialogue and collaboration. We received various responses, feedback [English] from people in the North and those in the South.
It was the page with the most clicks, we had a kind of quiz with old Mitrovica photographs, where was it taken and when? And then there were some modest prizes. A dinner in a restaurant, be it in the North or in the South. Sometimes there were Albanians voting to go to the North, or… really, it was one of the best projects and I loved it very much. We also received threats. When we wrote about the mosque, I mean, that was right behind the bridge, I mean, Mitrovica was identified by the bridge, the mill and the mosque, for example, they would say, “Do you want to bring it back?” And people, if we asked to bring it back, because it was one of the symbols that identified Mitrovica…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Did they tear it down, or what happened?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, unfortunately… In fact, no signs of its existence can be found. It was there until ‘99. The mosque didn’t bother anyone. Then it was totally destroyed. And they erased any trace of the mosque’s existence, now that part is covered in concrete. And with the project of the European Union, I mean, it cannot be seen at all. And we received such threats when we wrote about Mitrovica at that time before ‘99. But at the same time, with people seeing that we were succeeding, somehow some bridges were opened between people, and this motivated us. At the same time, there were blockades from decisionmakers, you know, they simply didn’t help. It was pretty difficult, but…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Was this a project to create a kind of mutual imagination of the city?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, yes, absolutely. Simply… because it hurts a lot when the city you grew up in with pride, a city that promoted and embraced values and diversity, that was known all around because of this, now turned into a city of problems, a city of divisions and murders. Somehow, when I went to other cities, “Where are you from?” “From Mitrovica.” They would either say, “Ufff.” I mean, as if they felt pity for you. Or, “Huh, Mitrovica, the whole Kosovo is in trouble because of you.” This kind of image of the city that was created somehow hurt. And not only that…
We somehow aimed to bring that image back. And we always collaborated. I mean, this also contributes to peacebuilding and reconciliation in the city as well as normalization. But we wanted to fix the image. There were people who said, “Do you want to bring Yugoslavia back? Yugo-nostalgics!” There were such voices, but we didn’t care about them, because if we did, we wouldn’t be able to do what we did.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Did you think that increasing your communication, in a way you were also returning?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, that is… I mean that has always been my mission, my personal mission as well as the mission of my colleagues. Because we thought that as many doors were opened, it was easier for us, yes. Believe it or not, there were times that I went to the North even when I had nothing to do there. I just wanted to go, I didn’t want to get tired of waiting. I said, “Let’s try, let’s try!” I mean, and I said, “If I don’t go, nobody will.” Institutions didn’t dare going. I mean, they wouldn’t have the courage to initiate or take the initiative to go.
They didn’t even have the courage to support us in most cases. And I would go. Sometimes, I would just take a walk there and return. I said, “Let them get used, let them see that I will go and I won’t stop.” Then there was also the cemetery, the graves of my father and my brother were there. It was painful because there was a period when I couldn’t even go, because they would not let me, they would throw stones at me. Or, if I found someone among my international friends to send me there… Because once you went up there, it was known that that was the Albanian cemetery and I could only stay there for one minute or half a minute and run back quickly. Then they demolished them many times. The pieces, my Serbian colleague brought me the pieces inside my office. She was terrified how was that possible, you know, because of an Albanian name and… this is painful because…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Did any organized form of visiting the Albanian cemetery exist at that time?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, for Eid, yes. The Islamic Community would organize a visit by bus from here for Eid. And there was an unwritten agreement, Serbs would not bother us for Eid because they knew it was a holiday. Yes, for example the bus would stop down there. If somebody’s graves were up high, such as my father’s and my brother’s, when you reached them the time had come to return and you had no time. Those who had them closer, you know, had more time. But sometimes you only needed to go on your own and not under pressure, or not simply to bring flowers but to spend some time there or plant some flowers and clean it.
And it was very sad how sometimes we couldn’t do at least that. And we had tried to do something in that direction. For years, we communicated with the core actors from the Municipality, two, three municipalities in the North, because we didn’t know where to go….and UNMIK [United Nations Mission in Kosovo], this parallel office, then the Administrative Office. I mean, you had to have three permissions or consents in order to allow Albanians to go and clean or repair the graves that were demolished, and not let them be demolished. Or Serbs to come here, because some Serbian graves were demolished here as well.
And once we reached a kind of reconciliation, consensus, you know, there would be, or how it happened to us, an adviser of a mayor or the prime minister with a bombastic declaration, would do the opposite. They would take us back. For example when we saw, Serbs were asking, their condition was, “We, Serbs want to clean the graveyards, we don’t want the Albanians to do it.” Albanians asked for the same thing. And we just saw a decision from somewhere above in the South, Albanians had just began to clean the graveyards of Serbs, the total opposite of what they had asked for. Then…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: But the graveyards of Serbs were in the South?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes. And then, such problems we had as an organization. Only did they not trust us anymore, but my colleague said, “Sorry, I cannot even come to work.” We received many messages telling us, “You have lied to us.” Then we had to write a kind of press release to tell them that it wasn’t our activity, we thought this way, to respect all the communities, you know. But you know when it is a boom, it is very difficult to, you know…This is only one of the examples of the harms that immature and rushed decisions caused, were they intentional, I don’t know, I never knew. But they made our work more difficult.
Then there were a lot of good projects that today are organizations, they still function. For example the School of Rock functions as an organization in itself. I mean, I am happy when I see them on television or somewhere, concerts or… I mean, to be honest I even saw them going into a tour around Europe. They were voted and awarded several prizes. I get very happy when I see them, you know, knowing such a difficult journey it was. Or the Qendra e Grave [Center of Women], or the Asociacioni i Grave për të Drejta të Njeriut [Association of Women for Human Rights].
Erëmirë Krasniqi: How did they introduce themselves?
Valdete Idrizi: No, Kosovska Mitrovica of course, you know, from Serbia. Since there was the revolution in Serbia, they said that they were from Serbia but from Kosovska Mitrovica, then they started saying, “Mitrovica Rock School.” However, you know how, they mentioned it. Some didn’t. We saw that they moved forward. But, there are some, some of their impressions that they would write themselves, I mean, how it changed their lives, the fact that they went to the summer school in Skopje. Then they began to do it here in Kosovo.
For example, they went, they came to Hotel Palace here in Mitrovica, Serbs and Albanians, they came to the South for the first time and performed and they forgot where they were, I mean, because they got into music. Or now, they are performing in Hamam Jazz Bar.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Really?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, then they went to the Swiss Diamond Hotel, there was an activity, I saw them, I felt so good. And…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: So you have worked to integrate Serbs as well…
Valdete Idrizi: Yes…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: …in other parts of Kosovo…
Valdete Idrizi: Yes…
Erëmirë Krasniqi:…not only integrate them in Mitrovica?
Valdete Idrizi: Absolutely…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: On your own, I mean…
Valdete Idrizi: …no, no. We knew that in order for someone from the North to free your apartment, we need to make it possible for them to return to their place, you know, how is it possible, because otherwise it couldn’t be done. But when you look at them, some of them have studied abroad…For example, I know that Elbenita Kajtazi, she is a talent, she worked a lot. But I am very proud, because as a student of the School of Rock she made her way to Operas, to Deutsche Opera in Berlin and all around the world.
Or there are some others, Blerta or Visar Kasa, and they are pretty good, you know. Or teachers who are really really good, they contributed to their development, I mean, Zana, Edon, Nesim, they contributed and keep contributing to their development. So, somehow I am very happy when I see them, and I always say that everybody thought that I was yhyy [onomatopoeic], meaning she was crazy}, I mean, because they didn’t believe in this idea, “How can you think about music when people are getting killed?” This is what they told me. Their view was very narrow, you know?
But I always believed. And I am very happy when I see them now, when I see them myself. I rarely see them personally, but when I hear or read about them, as much as I can manage to follow them, I feel really happy. Or Asociacioni i Grave [Women’s Association], for example, back then we began with a small center, since it worked…they worked with crafts, then there was a class of children, the books… Yes, because there were Serbs and Albanians and they didn’t know each other’s language. Because Albanians were returning, some would simply stay. But when there were incidents, when Albanian and Serbian children fought each other, women in the center would solve everything.
Then they started to install some lights, as if it was not obvious who was attacking whom, or throwing stones in the yard. They did a lot of simple good things that would directly impact the improvement of life and the integration of Albanians who had returned, as well as the improvement of relations, I mean, inter-social relations there. A lot of work has been done, I mean, they had good effects. After it worked, we went to other mixed neighborhoods and that is where it was proven that women are capable of a lot more. They organized themselves. And then, now it is an organization in itself.
They are doing amazing work. Sometimes they invite me to their activities and I am very happy to see them. You know, and I know that it was worth it, to simply trust them, because they did it, not I. I might just have given them a push. I am very, very proud of them. All the difficult journey, the walk, the fall, the standing, I mean everything was worth it. Because if I thought that the CBM did not exist now, but also other organizations, because they key to our success was that we always worked together, if they didn’t exist, it would be a lot worse. You know, these initiatives wouldn’t exist either.
But somehow, somehow, no matter my personal experience and the experiences of others, no matter all the unfairness, somehow I am thankful for not having lost the trust in humanity. I mean, I managed to love people, to continue loving people, because it wasn’t easy. You always have your fears and dilemmas, as everybody else. Especially when you live in a city where you always feel like…on hold, “I haven’t returned yet, I will return, I will return.” That becomes a part of your life and identity, whether you want it or not. And at the same time you are interrupted, you cannot go, the fight continues. But…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Did independence give you any hope for Mitrovica, in 2008?
Valdete Idrizi: Talking about the Independence Day, for example…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: How did you experience it here?
Valdete Idrizi: You know, the day, for example, because one can feel every possible feeling on Independence day. Starting from happiness, first of all. Kosovo became a state. Starting from fear, because it became a state without the North, and we lost that part. Starting from fear of what would happen, because we knew that the North wouldn’t accept our independence that easily, and there are still Albanians there and they will suffer from it, and one day they will also be expelled. Starting from that, somehow I felt guilty to be totally happy. You know, such a bad feeling that you couldn’t be totally happy for the independence.
At the same time, it was everybody’s dream to see Kosovo’s independence being declared, on the other side it wasn’t full, you couldn’t be happy. For example, I drove around with my car all day, together with my friend and colleague, through the crowd, seeing flags and shouting. And, we were happy but afraid at the same time… and constantly on the phone with those in the North. I mean, not only with Serbian colleagues, but also Albanians who were there, because we didn’t dare being fully happy. On the other side, we said, “Is it normal for us not to be as happy as those in the other cities?”
We went to Pristina. You know, there was a totally different atmosphere there. Because here, you couldn’t even go near the bridge, nor shoot or be so happy. As for every liberation day. We don’t even have a liberation day to celebrate here. And when we went there, somehow, we kinda felt jealous. On the other hand, we were happy because people should be happy, but we also felt guilty because we couldn’t be totally happy. I cried as a child and that is why I am saying that I cannot describe it otherwise, because I felt everything on that day.
And I don’t know. You return home and back to reality. Did anything change for us? Nothing. The other day, after the independence declaration, you still weren’t able to return home. There were still incidents. Hope still existed. I mean, if we return again, I mean, everything we did, we did it for the people and with the people. Since life didn’t get better and independence didn’t improve the quality of life nor…So, however the euphoria continued and the expectations… for us there was no change. At all. I mean…
And this is the fear we experienced that day… maybe it [independence] will happen without that part [the North]. And today, for example, even though human relations have improved, there are not so many incidents, there are a lot more people coming and going, I mean, Serbs coming to the South, but however, it is another reality. It is not the same as everywhere in Kosovo. There is still the fear that something can happen to you when you go to the other side. I don’t know, it is still here, the impossibility to return to your home. There, where you always wanted to return. I don’t know. But at the same time, we don’t have the luxury to give up and be pessimistic.
So, by excluding the impossible, you see other opportunities. You stand up and see other opportunities as well as the light, the light and hope that it can simply become better. And I don’t know, maybe people are tired, they are really tired of waiting for so long. I mean, I see them when they say, “You know what? No independence, no Kosovo, no Serbia, nothing.” I mean, all these big words that are said from Brussels and all around, they don’t improve the quality of your life. We saw that Serbs, who were the biggest advocates of divisions or the others who were with us, to normalize, they changed their approach because politics got them tired. They are really tired.
And maybe this is the hope and the opportunity that we see. Because of the tiredness of both sides and the instrumentalization of people, maybe this is the best opportunity to do… to turn it the way it is turned, it will never return here, I mean, we are convinced now. But, maybe to have a kind of normal life, not to have the direct fear, maybe that is my hope…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Can we talk about the awards you have been given as a peace activist?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: How did it come to there? What kind of awards are they?
Valdete Idrizi: The first international award was in 2008. Actually, I was nominated at the end of 2007. It was the [International] Woman of Courage Award, given by the State Department [English]. For the first I was studying in Novi Sad, the Master’s program was in Managing of Conflicts. And somebody from the American Embassy, back then, the American Office, called me. She said, “I am Afërdita, do you have two minutes?” I said, “Can you call me later because I am busy?” You know, I was… she said, “Yes.”
She called me. She said, “Valdete, we as an office, there is an award given by the Secretary of State,” she said, “For a non-American woman. It is the most prestigious award given to recognize the contribution to peacebuilding and the promotion of women.” And I said, “Ok.” To be honest, I had never heard about that award. She said… and I had never collaborated with them before. I hadn’t applied, I never had applied for projects at the Embassy… I mean, I didn’t have any collaboration because I didn’t know them. She said, “We thought, we want to nominate you for that award,” she said, “for the great work you are doing in Mitrovica with all the communities for peace building.”
“Uh,” I said, “Thank you!” I said, “That’s very good,” you know. Honestly, I felt really good. Then I was reminded that she had been part of a delegation once and I had presented the work done with Albanians and Serbs and we had discussed it, but it had not registered it in my mind. She only told me later. And I forgot that day and I told them, “Mhhm…My colleagues,” because we were all from the Balkans and the Middle East, I said, “They called me like this and that, but that was it,” I said, “Enough.” And I said, “Thank you, there are many women in Kosovo.” I had my own list of women who inspired me. Super. I totally forgot.
Two months later when she came, she said, “The official wants to meet you,” the American who was in charge of public relations. Alright, I went. It was my first time at the Embassy. I met and talked to him. Alright. Then I totally forgot about that. Then they called me to notify that I was in the shortlist together with three other women. Because all the embassies in the world nominate one. It was a pretty rough competition. But I didn’t know and I didn’t even have time because we had a lot of work those days, and I wasn’t thinking about awards. Then I thought that it was over with that and this was enough…I felt very proud, you know.
When I returned, they gave me the news. The Ambassador herself. They played a game with me, they said, “Somebody wants to talk about projects with you.” And then they said, “You are the winner. Can you go to America to take the award?” Wow, it was a lot, I had a lot of responsibility, I experienced it as a big responsibility. Encouragement, of course, for the work that I had done until that time, but at the same time, I was happy, you know. Because I couldn’t imagine how was it that I, among eight women in the world, was being given that award. Somehow… all my family was happy, I mean, I was living with my mother, my brother and his wife.
And my whole family was happy. Because they said, “Don’t make it a big deal, only with your family and friends.” The staff here got crazy, they were so happy. What made me really happy is that they didn’t experience it as my award only, but as theirs too. I mean, all those with whom I worked, because that was who I am. I wasn’t only one Valdete. It happened because of me, but I was all of them together. And that made me happy because somehow they accepted this award. And then I went to America to receive it, and there I experienced all the possible feelings…I thought of my father who for example, some times ago when I was little… we would look at a house, let’s say the White House in a movie, and he would say, “This? You will go there.”
You know, I thought about all of that. And of course, when we talk about work, it helped me a lot because I got very famous, I became famous because it was right after the declaration of independence, a peace award given to a woman, you know. And I was the first from Europe to be given it, you know, nobody had won it before. Not to talk about the Balkans. And it was very well covered in the media. Our leaders started accepting me to meetings and congratulating me and somehow in a way recognizing my work as well.
And this was maybe the greatest success because it helped me realize some of the projects more easily. The big barriers or attacks somehow minimized because, “Ha! Now America has recognized her.” I was also a honourable guest of the President of America back then and for that time it was a big privilege. All our work, all those years, all that journey was finally recognized by someone. And I would say, how come the most powerful man in the world is telling me, “Thank you for contributing to the world peace,” when that is my obligation, you know?
This is something I consider an obligation, to work for my county. Somehow, of course it made me feel very proud, as well as all the people around me. Then, after this, some other awards followed. Another year, 2009 there is the Soroptimist Peace Prize which is given by the Soroptimist group, from the European Federation. And it came at the best moment, because that award, besides the recognition… because the Congress that had been held in Amsterdam where I had the main speech… especially after independence, and what was waiting ahead for our country and I mean the processes…
And I had the chance to represent my work in front of, I mean, there were one thousand women in that hall from all the countries in the world. Because I was nominated by the Pristina Soroptimist Club. They knew me through the first award and the work that I had done, also many interviews and they simply thought that I was decent for that award. When I went there, together with the award I received twenty thousand euros. And to tell you why I am saying that, that money came at the best possible moment, because the School of Rock was just founded at that time and we were suffering from a financial crisis and we were at risk to lose our location, in the Women’s Center we received two negative answers and so on.
You know, when that money came, bre, it made all them stand up. Because I immediately told them, I sent it directly to the organization, we found a place. At that time, even if ten times the amount of that money came later, it would not have had the same effect. So, it is maybe bad to think about the money, but it was a very good surprise because it went exactly there, which was the reason why I took the award. Because I didn’t take it as Valdete, but together with the youth, women, and the work that they had done. And when I told them that, you know that I said that it came at the best time possible.
This award after the other one, and I mean, it was a big privilege. I am very thankful to all those who nominated me because I really think that there are many women who deserved the award and who have done much more than I did, also the generations before me and so on. And I felt really, really proud. That is why I feel responsible, because you know, there are many women who deserved it, but I took it, and now I have to maintain it. I have to work, I have to work even more.
Lately, in 2016 there was another award. This came as a very big surprise, the International Women in Television, Film and Screen-Based Media Prize, this is how it is called WIFTS Peace Prize 2016. I hadn’t heard about it either, I even asked myself, “What do I have to do with television?” But Arta Dobroshi called me, the actress whom I really love. I thought that she needed me for some material, a documentary or a movie. I mean, “What can I do for you?” Because I really love her. We met. She said, “What are you doing?” I said, “I am working for CiviKos, I am leading it. We are growing,” I said, “as an organization. We have been pretty successful. There are some challenges and problems as well.”
I said, “Half of me,” I said, “Is working,” I said. I was a mentor of girls for peace, Albanian and Serbs. I said, “The other half of me.” Because we had began with the Academy of Women Dialogue for young girls. And I said, “I am still in the Mitrovica Forum, leading it.” I said. “These are volunteer jobs, half of me.” I said, “And my other half is working for CiviKos.” She said, “That’s so good.” Then she said, “You know what, there is an award.” I thought that she was talking about herself, I was like, “Wow,” I said, “That’s so good.” I thought she was talking about herself. I was so happy.
Then she said, “No,” she said, “For you.” I said, “Why me?” When I said that, she said, “How come you are asking why, you just told me what you are currently doing.” I said, “No, that’s for the movie.” And it was really, really, I don’t know…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Did she nominate you or did she give you the news?
Valdete Idrizi: No, she gave me the news. But she told me, “I have,” she said, “no say in this. I am only one of the people who gave information about you when they asked for it.” Of course she did, she was happy and she gave them the information. Maybe she was the one to be blamed. But also somebody else, there was a producer who had been here during the Bridge Film Fest for example, he stayed here for a week. We talked about work and I told him about the situation. And he had been that second person. I didn’t know anything… I hadn’t even heard about that organization.
And so last year, I went to London and received the award. Being among all the women I had seen on television, you know, in movies… among famous actresses, producers, directors. I don’t know how I felt there, I was like, “Huh.” It was very, very, very good. But maybe the gratitude, the gratitude that I had from the community and the people, that is what I care about fanatically. These make me become a better person and a devoted worker. Because for example, last year they surprised me in Cerajë, in my village as well.
They simply gave me an award for the work that I have done. And I am really young to receive awards, you know, I consider that somebody older than I am should receive them, someone with a life and professional background… They made me cry because I never lived there. We went there as many times as we wanted to. Then, the Mitrovica youth as well as civil society… So, I am really, really… I am lucky.
And at the same time I am very thankful to all of them. They simply made me do my work in a better way because I took them as a big responsibility. Besides, I mean, the pride… somehow I wanted to give a message through that fame that we are all Valdete. And as much as I could, I used it to give the message that really, if somebody wants, believes, insists and loves, you know, their people and country, it is not easy, but one must not give up.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Here we can finish the interview, but I want to make sure that… if you have anything else to tell us that… I mean, something that is necessary to be said? But you don’t have to, you know. Everything you told us was very interesting.
Valdete Idrizi: Don’t…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: You have more stories about people, and if you have left anything aside, this is the moment when we can return to something more specific? I mean, to tell us about the initiative for divided cities…
Valdete Idrizi: Yes.
Erëmira Krasniqi: Is it something that is…
Valdete Idrizi: it is very important, especially that. I knew, you know that I told you that I wanted to talk about it. It is especially….For example the idea of the Forum of Cities in Transition. In 2008, I met a professor, Borego Mali, who is a person who lived in divided cities…during the apartheid in South Africa, and Boston. In fact he was originally from there. We were to Northern Ireland and he told us that idea and somehow he opened my eyes. I said, he said, “Maybe Mitrovica has to be,” he said, “But it is problematic because the Southern and Northern municipalities don’t recognize each other after the Independence declaration and so on.”
The Northern and Southern municipalities didn’t recognize each other. They said, “Illegal municipality,” they said, “The municipality of Serbia,” I mean in the North, I mean, they considered each other illegal. But being someone who is known and active and accepted by both sides, I said, “I am in a pretty good position to be able to convince those from the North as well as those from the South to be part of the Forum of Cities in Transition.” Because it was a condition that there should be municipalities, I mean, municipalities in our case.
And somehow I immediately said, “Yes.” I said, “Yes, we can do it.” [English]. Without thinking about how I would convince them. And I saw that as a city…and I knew the benefit. Because when they told me about some cities, seeing Berlin there as well, I mean, other cities that had always been divided and got united. Or Northern Ireland, you know, how the peace process went, you know, I had read about them during my studies but I was also interested. And when I came to Mitrovica, first to the Mayor in the South, I said, “There is an idea.” I made it look a big deal in his eyes. In fact, it was but… I had the first information.
I also tried to go to the North, first through my colleagues. I found someone from the media, someone from the civil society and someone from business, and we managed to create a delegation. In 2009 we went to Boston, to the University of Massachusetts, and that is where the Forum of Countries in Transition was established, imagine, Mitrovica was as a founding city of that. And since there were two Mayors, two representatives of the municipality as well as other officials, plus we also had people from the central government, we had the Minister Bajram Rexhepi, Sadri Ferati, Oliver Ivanović, Ljubiša Petrović, these were all political representatives and then we were from civil society.
In order not to have any problems with each other as far as the narrative that they would follow goes, they entrusted this part to us from the civil society. And it was a good decision, because when we presented it, we were so enthusiastic and without having the consent of all of them, we showed up and said, “We are the first city volunteering to organize the inaugural conference of cities in transition in 2010.” Oh, we didn’t even think about what that meant, I mean all the work and the responsibility and the time we needed to organize it. I mean, in 2010 there were local elections in Serbia, and they were organized in Northern Mitrovica as well. And there are always troubles during elections time.
We were waiting for around one hundred delegations from all around the world, whom we needed to help with the visa and other papers. We had to prepare the program and make sure that everything was alright. Furthermore, there was no canalization in the Cultural Center where we were planning to organize it because it was more suitable for those from the North as well as those from the South, and the toilets were all demolished. When we said, “Yes,” we didn’t think about these problems. But then slowly we sat, wrote and told the secretary in Boston, “We have these problems. We have to talk to various donors.” Trust me, we managed to get around 350 thousand euros.
And as a Forum, it is a volunteer team, it is not registered as an organization, we signed some principles as a basis on which we work, simply, not to call it Kosovo Metohija or Serbia, but to focus on the city and its inhabitants. It was difficult to reach all those, but we managed. And you know, the conference that was about to begin the next day, I mean on that date, the floor was not dried out yet, because we had just fixed it, cleaned it. I mean, we had worked on it all night long, and it was fixed one day before.
And it was one of the best conferences that could ever happen. When I say one of the best, I am talking about the presence of two Serbian leaders who were part of the panel and who were in competition for the North, I mean, in the election. For the first time, we had the police, the commanders of both police stations, for the first time they directly faced each other in a panel, because we had never seen them together before. There was a panel of people who didn’t know each other, all the videos are on the website of…
And we managed to have delegations of many other divided places, I mean, from Kirkuk in Iraq, from two cities in Northern Ireland, Belfast and Derry, Londonderry. We had Nicosia in Cyprus, Mostar. Then also Berlin, Nigeria, Kaduna. I mean, we had all other places, Beirut, Jerusalem, Haifa, I mean as cities. Later they came from Ramallah. So, all the cities who were divided or that we called cities in transitions, or had been divided in another phase.
Why am I mentioning this is because it is very important, because on one side being part of civil society, I mean, this was the only way you could move forward because you were recognized by both parts of the city which didn’t recognize each other. Secondly, we benefited a lot as a city from other programs that followed. For example, the police in the South and the North went to Northern Ireland many times, with programs and trainings that they don’t have in the curricula here. I mean, how to react when pride [parades] are organized, because there were no prides here while they were pretty famous there. They exchanged experiences.
There were simultaneous visits to Israel, young people from Mitrovica, volunteers went to various places. We managed to develop other projects, the renovation of the conferences hall. The Forum still continues, every city takes some tasks as an obligation to contribute to the unity of the city, or I mean, the improvement of the city. So, this was something, being part of the world, as a city, and you slowly see it, I mean, it takes time to realize the city, but it is not impossible. It gave us a light of hope that much more can be done.
On the other hand we managed to simply bring the mayors together, because they didn’t even know each other. So, I mean it was, we used that way to benefit as a city, you know, not individually.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Does the collaboration continue to be close?
Valdete Idrizi: Yes, it continues, even though the collaboration between municipalities has weakened these last two year, because there was negligence on the part of the municipalities. However, as a delegation, as civil society, we managed to go to Lebanon [Beirut], which is one of the hosting cities, and we managed to help them in the process. We showed up to help them in projects concerning women empowerment, to use practices from here and help them. as much as we could, I mean, because we didn’t have support from the municipality this time.
But there have been ups and downs, so I hope that next year Mitrovica will be in a better position and with greater possibility to share capacity, and also getting funds, why not. For the betterment of citizens, national communities. So, it was one of the best experiences. We managed to be a host of the cities in 2013. The Youth Forum of Cities in Transition, because there were young people from Mitrovica who won scholarships to go to America to study.
One from the North and the other from the South, they showed that we have good qualities, a commitment, good students. And they proved themselves as youth leaders who are as enthusiastic as we, the older ones, they said that they would organize the Youth Forum here. And it resulted to be a successful Forum with youth delegations who came to Mitrovica. And we, the older ones only shared our experience with them and tried to encourage them.
So, it is encouraging, and I am sure it will continue in the future because they won’t be able to stop, I mean, an individual, a male mayor, or a woman mayor, won’t be able to stop them. But sometimes, there are cases when it gets slow. We have seen other municipalities and we haven’t seen the support of one individual, but the pressure from other individuals made the progress possible. I will continue working as a volunteer in this Forum and simply put pressure to do our duty, because we can benefit from other’s experiences, to become maybe like Berlin.
Because it is encouraging seeing people from Berlin, “Wow, wow.” Or Northern Ireland, the Derry bridge [The Peace Bridge in Derry], for example, when we walked there and they told us, or the movies that I have seen, or when they told me that it was impossible to cross it, just like ours. And then we crossed, we walked across. This is… the Forum, I love this initiative because it has been very beneficial for us.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Let’s finish it here.
Valdete Idrizi: Okay.
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Thank you very much!
Valdete Idrizi: Thank you because I have never told so much in my life (all laugh). And especially maybe for the first time, I have never believed that I would be able to take all that out, I haven’t thought about it at all, but…
Erëmirë Krasniqi: You didn’t have when…
Valdete Idrizi: No, exactly. But I am happy with it… Thank you [English].
Erëmirë Krasniqi: Thank you!